We are so bad about writing on here lately. Sorry for all you faithful blog-checkers :-) Anyway, it's been crazy (what's new) lately. Especially this week for Mark. He's got meetings in Portland today, a drive to Olympia and back tomorrow and a drive to Redmond on Friday! His work for PDR has been such a blessing even with all the driving! I don't know what we would have done without it.
My world has been really up and down lately too. Asher is a pretty good kid but his schedule has been weird and off the past month. I think he's getting ready to give up the 3rd nap but he's still to cranky without it. We had over a week where he was awake from nap #2 by 2pm and it took all our energy and strength to keep him up just barely until 6:30pm. He sleeps great at night... but a 5am start is more than either Mark or I can take... especially when it starts with a bloody murder scream! Haha. Well, it really isn't too funny but we've come out of that a little bit. He got a cold last week too so that certainly didn't help. But I've tried some new methods of keeping him awake and just learning more about what is helpful for him so that past few days have been far more pleasant.
Which brings me to my next topic... Asher was so unpleasant that I was going crazy! I was angry all day, frustrated, feeling helpless and just tired. One night I went to bed at 7pm, slept until 6am when Asher got up and I was still feeling as miserable as ever. I was struggling so badly with feeling like I didn't know what I was doing, thinking that God should have never made me a parent and that I just couldn't do it that I started avoiding talking to people about how I was doing. It's tough! But after a good talk with my friends Kristi and Chelsi I started talking to a couple other people about it and I just feel so much better. Well, the point of all this is I'm going to be doing some research on Thyroid problems b/c a couple people suggested that might be it. The fatigue and rate of weight loss I get with exercise are key things to having a hyper-thyroid. I just need to find some more info on it and see if it would be worth it to see someone even without insurance or what.
Well, other than that it's just been the daily grind. Jeanne's in Hawaii so I've been doing some work from home. I'm actually going to do a shoot with Tracy and her dog this week... Chloe is so cute! It should be tons of fun! I should get back to editing though... I still have some senior photos to finish up. Here's a cute one of Asher the other day...
November 18, 2008 at 1:26 PM
Every kid should be blessed with a Mom as loving as you!
November 19, 2008 at 8:09 AM
Thyroid problems or not, that first year of baby's life is HARD and exhausting. I have been amazed at how much you have been able to do this past year. My life pretty much stopped for about 3 years, since I had my babies back to back. Jo, being a mom is probably the second hardest thing I have ever done in my life! When I was a stay at home mom, I used to have people tell me that staying home was harder than working. Now that I work, I know that is true. There are few things in life that are harder than what you are doing right now. I lost my patience more than I ever imagined possible during those first years and there were honestly a few times I thought about calling child services on myself (you know. Those times when you scream at your kid and then lock yourself in the other room for a few minutes because you want to make sure your child is still alive in the morning), but then I realized that even with all my faults, my child could never be loved by anyone else as much as I love him and that we all have our limits. Hang in there. It does get easier. I know from experience :-).
November 19, 2008 at 12:35 PM
Hello Jo! I just read your blog and girl you are in my prayers...whatever the case may be God has it all in His hands and He is just waiting to take it. I know so cliche right? But God is so worthy to be trusted even when we feel we aren't good enough to tell Him about it. I will continue to pray for you and I can't wait to see your mommyness in action. Love you lots your friend, sister and fellow mommy, Rayma
November 19, 2008 at 1:43 PM
Thanks everyone! It is tough but it always seems to get easier when you are finally desperate enough to ask God for help :-) So ironic.
Rayma... I cannot wait to see you!!!!!! And everyone in your family of course :-) I can't believe it's been so long! We will have to have some sort of party... maybe us with the Marrs and Lacines... so fun!